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Thread: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

  1. #1
    Richard Moschetti Jr's Avatar
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    My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    My spouse is the most negative person on the planet. She says I wasted my money getting my C Private Investigator License, joining IPIU and anything else that has to do with Private Investigation. She thinks I should just apply for Lt. and Capt. at DOC but then she'll complain about the hours and not enough money.

  2. #2
    Arthur Jackson -'s Avatar
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    Re: She used to laugh at me. Now I have my own Firm!

    Well Richard, I suggest that you make this thing work. Some people are
    just made that way, that's what makes them great, they give us our
    balance. You have all of us standing with you. I spent some time in
    the Marine Corp., and this program seems to be "Semper Fi": Always
    Faithful. Don't you love these forums, we meet great people! hang
    in there. Aj

  3. #3
    Wes Williams's Avatar
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    Re: She used to laugh at me. Now I have my own Firm!

    Way to go Richard. After working in corrections for thiry years I decided it was time for a change. Although I can live comfortably on my retirement and annuity, I decided to get into the PI field. I guess I still need some excitement in my life. I am not looking to get rich or famous, but to try and make the world a better place.

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    Kevin Urbanczyk--'s Avatar
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    Re: She used to laugh at me. Now I have my own Firm!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wes Williams View Post
    I am not looking to get rich or famous, but to try and make the world a better place.
    Same here ..

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    Re: She used to laugh at me. Now I have my own Firm!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wes Williams View Post
    I am not looking to get rich or famous, but to try and make the world a better place.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kevin Urbanczyk View Post
    Same here ..
    That goes for me too. But if both should happen, well......

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    Mark Messare - is offline Lifetime Professional Management Member

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    Re: She used to laugh at me. Now I have my own Firm!

    I agree that it's not about the money that would motivate someone to get involved in this industry. However money helps to pay the bills, and Im not against making a living. The biggest reason I like this industry is to be able to be a part of a team that is helping put a stop to bully's. That falls into the same reasons why I do martial arts. I believe in a nation "for the people by the people" and that we all need to help each other to keep our place a free nation.

  7. #7
    Richard Moschetti Jr's Avatar
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    Re: She used to laugh at me. Now I have my own Firm!

    As of 5-8-2009 I am OFFICIALLY RETIRED from Law Enforcement. 23 Years takes a toll on the body. Now it's time to relax and enjoy life!!!

  8. #8

    Re: She used to laugh at me. Now I have my own Firm!

    Quote Originally Posted by Richard Moschetti Jr View Post
    As of 5-8-2009 I am OFFICIALLY RETIRED from Law Enforcement. 23 Years takes a toll on the body. Now it's time to relax and enjoy life!!!
    Congratulations, Richard!

    Your retirement check will help take the edge off your monthly expenses, while you can start concentrating on how to develop more enjoyment in your professional life.

    Our polls found that many private investigators choose part-time because they can earn more per hour than a regular full time job - have more time left over to enjoy life.

    On the "expense" side of your professional career, if IPIU can help you save hundreds of dollars a year by incorporating your profession into a PI Agency Corporation License - let us know. We'd be delighted to share how over 300 everyday expenses can be deducted from your net personal income so you hardly pay any taxes.

    For details, go here:
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  9. #9
    Jerome O Isaac--'s Avatar
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Greetings Richard, it's nice meeting you here at IPIU, I hope you know that private investigations is a never retiring profession, so, dont make any future plans to.

    I still need some excitement in my life.
    This quote above will surely prove correct.

    Have a great day and all the best on the road ahead.

  10. #10
    Raul Lopez--'s Avatar
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Rich, Famous, Dashing, Debonaire. Hmmm.....Am i allowed to add a double 0 in front of my name?? Maybe i should start taking my martinis shaken and not stirred

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    Mark Messare - is offline Lifetime Professional Management Member

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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    I like the way you think Raul..

    Mark.

  12. #12
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    My husband was also very negative about this change in my career. Although I am still working full time at my other job. He feels that this career will change the life that we are use to. I will just have to prove him wrong. I feel like this will be exciting and give me a reason to want to go to work each day.

  13. #13
    Jerome O Isaac--'s Avatar
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Greetings Michelle, it's nice to see you. I do hope you're well and doing fine.

    He feels that this career will change the life that we are use to. I will just have to prove him wrong.
    I hope you do prove him wrong since you will be in full control of your work schedule and not to mention the extra free time to spend with your family.


    I feel like this will be exciting and give me a reason to want to go to work each day.
    Yes! the 50 plus areas in private investigation brings excitement to anyone approching this profession and you're right knowing that you're making a difference in the world will give you that reason.

    All the best to you on your journey.

    Have a great day.

  14. #14
    Michelle Soukup -'s Avatar
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Thank you so much Jerome. I have my first assignment this weekend and I am very excited.

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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    My wife is also very negative about my entering this field, but I think she sees my enthusiasm as a positive and is trying to give me an open mind on things as of today, the tuesday after my first assignment.
    Peace all

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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Being in this field, to me is the most rewarding as you can take the time to be compassionate with victims. You don't have to worry about being liked and cared about, you simply enjoy your work. I am one who keeps a positive attitude no matter how grim the situation. When I can help even one victim seek justice, then I feel rewarded because it is one more perp off the streets even if it's only a short while. Being a PI gets in your blood and well it simply stays.

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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    I have told few people about my first assignment. I get both positive & negative replies. I so want to show those negative people up. I know this can work as lonf=g as I am prepared & determined. PI as with every endeavor is a matter of persistance & I am determined to succed.

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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Quote Originally Posted by Susan M Smith View Post
    I have told few people about my first assignment. I get both positive & negative replies. I so want to show those negative people up. I know this can work as lonf=g as I am prepared & determined. PI as with every endeavor is a matter of persistance & I am determined to succed.
    You will, I am sure of it

    To all of you... My husband used to ask me when my first check was coming in (on a almost daily basis, when I first started). He since has learned to appreciate what I do (not just from the paycheck but from me being more happy than before, trust me.. there is a difference in going to work and coming home itching and unhappy on a regular basis, versus... now). Of course, it's not all sunshine (and everyday) and rich I didn't get (yet, lol) but it is more fullfilling (at least for me) than some of the other jobs I've had in my past... and that's what the difference is... just jobs vs career

    Thanks to everyone who gave their input, experience and ideas...

  19. #19
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Sorry to hear but as other stated be strong and move forward.

  20. #20
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    I am in the Fugitive Recovery field, and my husband thinks that it is a waste. He is retired, and thinks I need to be by his side. He just doesn't realize that his retirement check just doesn't go that far. I know he is a negative person and never takes a chance on life unless it is something for him. If I want something he turns positive into a negative, and if he wants something he has to have it even if it goes sour. I might be a medium framed lady, but I run my house. If mom is not happy neither will them. I will not let a negative person get in the way of what I want to do.

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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Quote Originally Posted by Tina Davenport View Post
    I am in the Fugitive Recovery field, and my husband thinks that it is a waste. He is retired, and thinks I need to be by his side. He just doesn't realize that his retirement check just doesn't go that far. I know he is a negative person and never takes a chance on life unless it is something for him. If I want something he turns positive into a negative, and if he wants something he has to have it even if it goes sour. I might be a medium framed lady, but I run my house. If mom is not happy neither will them. I will not let a negative person get in the way of what I want to do.
    A true testimony at how opposites are attracted to each other! My wife was a full time homemaker for many years with the children. After the children grew up, I encouraged her to find several niches of her own liking. Although her niches are not to my liking, it has improved our marriage.

    The next time you earn a nice paycheck for your hunting skills, just endorse the back of the check and make it payable to your husband with instructions that he can spend it anyway he wants!

  22. #22

    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    My wife would at times become skeptical of the piracy assignments because we had not received our first paycheck. So at a certain point, we stopped doing the assignments and play the waiting game. Let me just say the paychecks do come! Nice fat checks.

  23. #23
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Makes me wonder where Richard is now after reading this.

  24. #24
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    As a newcomer to this environment, I can honestly agree with Richard. My spouse was military with the 82nd ABN and gone a lot which made me a single parent most of the time. I was a school bus driver and wanted more for myself and my famliy. I decided to go back to school (had 2 young children) and persue a degree in criminal justice, hoping one day it would benefit us all. After graduating with a 3.58 GPU, Cum Laude honors, he said I just wasted my time and his money. He kept after me to get a J.O.B. and quit stalling because he wanted to retire from the military. I again went back to the classroom and got certified in Private Investigations. He divorced me last August (together for 16 years, married 10), saying I was a lazy, good for nothing, bum and we are still in court for child custody and marital assets. Oh well, TOO BAD for him because now that my career is on track, he will not reap the benefits for waiting it out and standing behind me. GOOD LUCK to ALL those out there wanting to better themselves and being strong to go after their dream. Ellen McManus

  25. #25
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    David has said "A true testimony at how opposites attract" but for me it is "opposites attack" but those bitter years are way behind me now. I have moved on and re-married to pursue my interest with full support. I am a computer forensic examiner doing penn testing and enjoying every minute of it. I then became an author and could not have done it without the support of my wife. I've been on both sides of attract and attack, from one extreme to the other. It is essential to have ppl supporting you and being a part of IPIU should always give you a sense of encouragement.

  26. #26
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Divorced and retired on disablity.

    I got hurt too much in corrections in state prison while working in confinement for 13 1/2 year straight

    I HAD ALOT OF USES OF FORCE IN CONFINEMENT AND MENTAL HEALTH. LIKE 250+ or so, lost count.
    RICHARD MOSCHETTI JR
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  27. #27
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Richard, that's why it took me so long to get into this field as well. I never had the support from the woman I was with at the time. Now that I'm single again I'm jumping in this and ready to go.

  28. #28
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Good for you Justin. I am sure you will do well. Whatever your need of support is be sure to ask here. There are many wonderful people here that are willing to help and share their knowledge.

  29. #29
    Peter Gentile---'s Avatar
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    After being in law enforcement for over 25 years I am very familiar with the stress and frustration that creeps into your life. I am retired now, and still with the same woman who put up with 22 years of my life in law enforcement. When the stress begins to impact your relationships/marriage you need to step back a bit and try to see it from the other person's point of view.

    No matter how close a person is to you, they will never fully realize what your profession subjects you to. No one ever understands why you give out traffic summonses. The use of force, on any level is never justified in the eyes of most people. Yet, most people want you there when they need you to protect them. It's just the way it is, and your significant other is no different. They may understand more than people in non-law enforcement relationships, but they never fully accept the fact that you need to be on the job when you are needed, not when you want to be or at normal bankers hours. Again, that's just the way it is, if you want to be in law enforcement or any type of investigative services you need to just suck it up and accept it.

    It is very difficult to prevent being overwhelmed by the "us against them" perception of the world. It is one of the things that creeps up without you ever realizing it. It will also creep into your relationship. Your significant other will see and feel it, although they may not be able to put their finger on it, it will have a terrible impact on your relationship.

    If anyone is considering going to relationship/marriage counseling my advice would be to find a counselor who is familiar with law enforcement needs.
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  30. #30
    Richard Moschetti Jr's Avatar
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    I am divorced and retired from law enforcement with an "in line of duty disablity' after 23 years of service. I am totally/permanently disabled and on social security disablity and can not work at all but at least i am still alive to enjoy retirement ;-)
    RICHARD MOSCHETTI JR
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  31. #31
    Jason Dillon -'s Avatar
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Richard,

    Your positive attitude is inspiring. I am just starting out here and it can all seem daunting. Thanks for sharing your story. It lets us new members remember to follow our hearts.

    Jason Dillon

  32. #32
    Richard Moschetti Jr's Avatar
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Quote Originally Posted by Jeffrey Barbieri View Post
    Makes me wonder where Richard is now after reading this.
    I am divorced and retired on disablity with an "In line of duty disablity" from my law enforcement job.


    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Jeffrey Barbieri View Post
    Makes me wonder where Richard is now after reading this.
    I am divorced and retired on disablity with an "In line of duty disablity" from my law enforcement job.

  33. #33
    Danny Guda's Avatar
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    Re: My spouse is the most negative person on the planet, says I wasted . . .

    Hi Sir Richard,

    That's the biggest challenge. But it will show the benefits and accomplishments in matter of times.

    take care

    dannyguda

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